When a guy sees a woman and goes to her to offer her drink, we call him, well, a “man”. When a woman does exactly the same, she is not just a “woman”. She is bold, aggressive, confident, cougar, slutty… etc.
I think the society, in general, raise women with the idea that it’s a feminine thing to wait, to be approached rather than approaching, to take the second step and never the first one. This pattern is our day to day life, not just sex. Paying for the drink and/or dinner, pulling the chair for her, opening the door, etc. All simple acts that always put the woman where she will be waiting for the man to take the lead.
I think they call a woman “aggressive” when she simply knows what she wants and goes for it.
I am generally dominant in bed but that doesn’t mean at all that I have a preference for “submissive” women. And I double-quoted it, because submissive in bed has nothing to do with being submissive as a person. I have been with very strong-willed women who were submissive in bed more than most.
So to sum up, I think whether aggressive or not, submissive or not, taking the lead or not… both men and women are all special and different in their own ways, And none should be described with any words that have negative connotation just because they were not part of the norms.
I consider myself polyamorous and it’s something that is hard to understand for many. It took me a long time to fully understanding myself. At first I saw myself as just another horny guy who can’t stop himself from wanting women, all of them. And I was seeing myself that way, not because I wanted “all women”, it was because I was comparing myself to the society where men and women grow up with the fact that the desire to be with ONE partner is what’s normal and accepted.
It was hard for me to accept the fact that I need, want and enjoy affection. That I can’t hold myself back and just force myself to direct all my feelings towards one single person. Now that I accept it and accept myself without having to live with guilt imposed by the society, I am happy, I know what I want and it’s easier for me to be clear with others about it up front, so no one will get hurt.
Polyamory is not about being greedy. Polyamory is not about sex. Even though sex is a good aspect of it, just like any sexual/intimate relationship.
Were you ever in a relationship and caught yourself enjoying a moment with another person who gave you butterflies and just wanted to let go and kiss them but you just kept holding back and repeating to yourself “I don’t cheat”?
Did you ever feel a strong feeling towards a friend that you couldn’t identify it whether it was just lust, love or just being really close to a friend?
If that’s the case, does it make you feel any better knowing that you are not alone?
Did you ever had a fantasy that…
Did you ever had a fantasy that would be considered by most as “dirty”, “kinky”, “perverted” and/or “forbidden”.. to the point that you find it hard to admit it to yourself even though it turns you on SO much?
I would like to hear them. We all have these and it’s always nice to let go and express it sometimes. I promise I won’t judge anyone based on fantasies.
(Note: I will keep all non-anonymous messages private unless you clearly mention that you want it to be shared. You can also use my email address which is in the “contact" page.)
Q:what do u think about incest? asking 4 a friend..
whether you are asking “for a friend” or not, that’s ok :)
I think you can read about what I think about incest in this post. If you still have more question. feel free to ask again.
to sum it up for you. I don’t think any for of sex should be considered wrong as long as it’s between two consenting adults where no one is hurt neither physically or emotionally. ( you can exclude the “hurt so good” kind of hurt out of the previous statement ;) )
Q:Is your avi picture you?
Yes, It is. And if you look around more carefully. I posted a couple more personal pics on the blog. :)
How can anyone like me when I don’t even like me?
sometimes we are too hard on ourselves .. that’s why others might see stuff they like about us that we can’t see about ourselves.
And sometimes we get hurt once, that we worry about getting hurt again and we kind of block our feelings and prefer to play it safe and just believe that no one should be interested in us.. thinking that this will protect us from any disappointments.